News just in

Go down

News just in

Post  Paul Dumighan's Solicitor on Thu Jul 31, 2008 4:24 pm

People are on the look out for John Darwin. He was last seen in the prison gym on the rowing machine. The rumour is that he is hiding out at Brixons house with Daggers.

Paul Dumighan's Solicitor

Posts : 3
Join date : 2008-07-17

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: News just in

Post  needle in a haystack on Wed Aug 20, 2008 11:05 am

News just in is that gavin Besty has moved into Ray jackson towers to take care off Rodney and mostly polish off some of Rays drink! Gavin has said he has never seen as much drink in his life but did say that there would not be any left when ray gets back from a 2 week break from spotting wild cat fish!

needle in a haystack
Gimp boy

Posts : 9
Join date : 2008-03-24

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: News just in

Post  Daggers on Wed Sep 10, 2008 8:47 am

News just in from the transfer rumour mill:

David Jackson to Leadgate
Jonny Craigs to Morpeth
Chris Mee (Clara Vale) to Swalwell
Half the Swalwell first team to A&E
Dennison Thomas to Kimblesworth
Colly Solomon to Ashington

Fu*k I'm bored!!!

Daggers
leg end

Posts : 13
Join date : 2007-11-15

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: News just in

Post  biker from mars on Wed Sep 10, 2008 11:47 am

When you came to Swalwell i had you down as a toucher but your defo a CRACKER!

biker from mars
shane warne

Posts : 22
Join date : 2008-02-08

View user profile

Back to top Go down

news just in

Post  meowsie mcdermott on Wed Sep 10, 2008 12:08 pm

A blow to Swalwell`s hopes of making it a hatrick of titles is the news that Richard Hawthorne is tyo retire form cricket to concentrate on his interests in the Mexican silver mining industry.

meowsie mcdermott
Gimp boy

Posts : 6
Join date : 2008-06-15

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: News just in

Post  Daggers on Thu Sep 11, 2008 5:01 am

Alongside my Venezuelan ferret farm, I'm going to be a busy boy!

Daggers
leg end

Posts : 13
Join date : 2007-11-15

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: News just in

Post  biker from mars on Thu Sep 11, 2008 11:29 am

what is bestys role in all of this daggers?

biker from mars
shane warne

Posts : 22
Join date : 2008-02-08

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: News just in

Post  qwertywerty on Thu Sep 11, 2008 3:06 pm

richard hawthorne was last seen cockle picking off tynemouth beach this evening wearing a tin hat, bullet proof jacket with his pony bowling boots on listening to some country western on his wireless!

paul 'pastie' dumighan has been busy all week as looks to find a winter hobby, all he has come up with so far is scottish dancing or he invitation to join the local scouts as he would be great for the camping trips as a alternative way of making a fire...!

as for next season swalwell cc are looking to youth for the 2nd team, in come rocky stoneman,jim mathewson and micky stephenson as he could do a job with keeper stood up!!!!!!

qwertywerty
steve harmisson

Posts : 63
Join date : 2008-03-04

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: News just in

Post  Daggers on Fri Sep 12, 2008 2:04 am

Besty is chief ferret feeder. He will approach their hutches at 6 in the morning and feed them duck a l'orange with a balsamic vinegar reduction, all the while regaling them with stories of guinness filled debauchery before heading back for a good fry up come half past 7.

Daggers
leg end

Posts : 13
Join date : 2007-11-15

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: News just in

Post  biker from mars on Wed Sep 17, 2008 2:17 am

Breaking news from Swalwell is Richie Hawthorn taking over the Captaincy from Paul 'beano' Dumighan. One of Richies many signings will be his brother to open the bowling as he swings it both ways and you can set a field to it!

biker from mars
shane warne

Posts : 22
Join date : 2008-02-08

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: News just in

Post  Daggers on Wed Sep 17, 2008 4:40 am

Breaking news: to combat the mighty Swalwell pace attack, every team in the league has appointed a left handed batting pro for next season. Gripper was last seen booking canoe lessons after his trip to B&Q with Kelly to buy some plywood, nails, an extension cable for the phone and a book on disappearing acts by Paul Daniels. He is also in discussions with Rook Matthews Sayer to buy the house next door to him. More details once they come in!

Daggers
leg end

Posts : 13
Join date : 2007-11-15

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: News just in

Post  Daggers on Wed Sep 17, 2008 4:54 am

More breaking news: George Neaven, having recently completed his apprenticeship, is now in the career market. However George has had a few early setbacks, being ejected from Sunniside Job Centre today. Problems arose when he approached the counter and whacked a freshly filleted salmon on the counter and asked when he started. The woman at the counter asked George what the salmon was for and he said he was surfing the internet and it said fish4jobs so he was here to apply.

Daggers
leg end

Posts : 13
Join date : 2007-11-15

View user profile

Back to top Go down

News Just In

Post  Mr Tumbles Lover on Fri Sep 26, 2008 5:31 am

It was announced today by Lord Coe on Galaxy radio that Paul 'Beano' Dumighan has been given the honour of lighting the Olympic flame for the 2012 games.

Coe awarded Dumighan the post after witnessing him first hand when he was a guest judge at Whickham Scouts Fire Lighting Competition. Coe was said to be speechless when he watched Paul set his fire alight within 5 seconds and without the use of sticks and just the rapid hand rubbing technique he has mastered over the years.

Paul will also have to be at the games throughout in case of the flame going out. This means his is having to hang up his nike t-shirt at the end of season 2011.

Paul was quoted as saying "This is the proudest moment in my life it even tops when i rescued my pet Iguana Wilson from the jaws of a Staffordshire Pit Bull Terrier whilst walking him in Saltwell Park 2002"

Our hearty congratulations go out to Paul and we wish him well for London 2012

Mr Tumbles Lover

Posts : 1
Join date : 2008-09-26

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: News just in

Post  biker from mars on Fri Sep 26, 2008 1:58 pm

Does that mean captain




Is that when Captain Daggers actually takes over the stripes?

biker from mars
shane warne

Posts : 22
Join date : 2008-02-08

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: News just in

Post  Eggbert Nobacon on Sat Sep 27, 2008 3:13 pm

what what what the mad man Arthur Askey of Anfield Cow Platt captain of our proud ship, do you think thats wise sir ?

Eggbert Nobacon
shane warne

Posts : 29
Join date : 2008-01-23

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: News just in

Post  Sponsored content


Sponsored content


Back to top Go down

Back to top

- Similar topics

 
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum